Before the conversation

Tough employee talk coming up?

Get a plan before you start: what to say, what to avoid, and when to bring in an HR expert.

  • What to say
  • What to avoid
  • When to bring in help
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Here’s what that looks like

One manager’s question, and Arvia’s answer

A manager asks

“I need to tell an employee her work isn’t meeting expectations. How do I prepare?”

Employee Relations

Start by making sure you can describe the gap in specific, observable terms before the conversation happens. Not “your work isn’t meeting expectations,” but what exactly isn’t meeting them, and how you know.

Here’s how to prepare
  • Identify the specific gap. What work, which deliverables, which behaviors? Name the concrete examples you’ll reference.
  • Check what she was told. Has she heard clear expectations before? If not, this is a coaching conversation about setting expectations, not a performance conversation about missing them.
  • Consider what might be contributing. A recent change in role, workload, manager, or something outside work can all affect performance. You don’t need to diagnose it, but go in ready to listen.
  • Decide what you’re asking for. What does “meeting expectations” look like going forward, and by when? She needs a clear picture of what success looks like, not just what’s wrong.

The goal of this first conversation is to be direct about what you’re seeing, give her a chance to respond, and agree on what changes are needed. Keep it a dialogue, not a verdict.

After the conversation, send a brief follow-up email summarizing what you discussed, what she agreed to, and what the next steps are. Keep a copy for your records.

If you’re unsure about any step, or if this situation escalates, get advice from an HR professional before you act.
Would you like a sample script or talking points for this conversation?

Arvia can help you think through the situation, but the final decision and reasoning are yours.

A real answer from Arvia’s Employee Relations agent.

What you get

Walk in prepared

What to say

Clear talking points and, when you want them, a sample script, so you can open the conversation calmly and stay specific.

What to avoid

The common missteps that make a hard conversation harder, from vague feedback to promises you can’t keep.

When to bring in help

Arvia is designed to tell you when to pause and bring in an HR consultant or an employment attorney, before a decision becomes a problem.

  • Your conversations are private to you, and your data is never used to train AI.
  • Guidance is informed by the employment laws where you work.
  • Arvia provides HR guidance, not legal advice, and it doesn’t make decisions for you. See our privacy policy and terms.

Have the conversation with a plan

Built on 25+ years of HR leadership, for managers and business owners with little or no HR support.

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